So after my rant on Tuesday I decided to go ahead and call Dr. Pappas so that I could get an appointment within the next month or two. In the past, whenever I called for my annual appointment, it would take at least a month to get in..sometimes longer. I hadn’t had to deal with that recently since I was coming in every month and would just schedule out for my next appointment, so I thought I was being pretty proactive. Plus, I was feeling kinda helpless and needed to at least have an appointment on the books so that I have a ‘next step’ of sorts. Anyway, I was shocked when the nurse was like “can you come in at 11:15 tomorrow?”
I made the appointment yesterday…amongst a ton of snow coming down….and it was bittersweet. After looking through my history and asking me about when I last ovulated, when I started , how I was feeling, etc, Dr Pappas said “Jen….I feel like I’ve exhausted all of my options here with you.” Before he could even say anything else I started crying in front of him. I knew we were at that point….I knew he had tried everything he knew to do…I knew I didn’t want to try more of the same…but it really was a blow to hear those words. He handed me some Kleenex and tried to make me feel better by telling me a couple of stories about ladies ‘just like me’ who got pregnant the minute he stopped working with them on it….he was very sweet…..but it’s nothing I hadn’t heard before. I pulled myself together and asked him what he would do in my position. His answer? IVF.
I’m totally on-board with IVF, and told him as much, but I’m not ready for that yet. First off, I don’t have $15k in savings….and it’ll take us at least a year to have that much that we can dedicate to a procedure that isn’t guaranteed. Plus, I’m not convinced that there is nothing wrong at this point. I asked Dr. P if there was a chance that I had PCOS, and he said yes. I asked if there was a chance I had endometriosis…and he said yes. I kinda thought I would have been told that over the past few years if that was possible, but he’d never mentioned either of those two words to me. In fact, the only reason I knew to ask about those is from reading other TTC blogs that deal with women with those issues. I have a lot of the same symptoms as those women, so I’d always wondered. Anyway, after he confirmed the possibilities of both PCOS and endometriosis, I asked him if he thought going to a specialist was a good idea…and he said yes.
Dr. P referred me to a Doctor Miller in Little Rock. He is sending my charts/history over this week, and I should hear from Dr. Miller’s office within the next couple of weeks to schedule an appointment. I’m not excited about the whole process, but I am excited to maybe get some answers. Hopefully they are good ones….I’ll let ya know.