June 26th Prompt- If you could give advice to a newbie infertile, what would it be?
I know what I would have liked to have been told, so that is what I’ll pass on:
- Be aggressive. If you are TTC and really serious about it, then REALLY go for it. Monitor your cycle, whether that means temping yourself or taking ovulation tests or whatever. And this means daily…if you skip a day, it could be THE DAY…then the whole point of the rest of the month is pretty much wasted. Know what your body is doing so that you can help your doctor key in on any issues more quickly.
- Tell your doctor everything. Does your husband smoke weed? Do you smoke cigarettes? Are you lying about your exercise? All this information (and so much more) plays into fertility, so be open
- Find a way to vent/discuss what you are going through. Maybe this is through blogging (such as myself), or maybe it’s just through venting to your spouse. Having some sort of support system through this trying time is totally needed for your sanity. Message boards/forums are also great
- Look into your insurance coverage early. This will help you know what you can afford and what you can’t…and knowing this will help you perhaps to start saving more or move on to different treatments sooner.
- Don’t give up quickly. It’s easy to lose hope…especially if you ‘just knew’ that as soon as you got off the pill you’d be knocked up. Trust me, I know! I tried to stay positive by always having a next step. I would go to my doctor’s appointment (say planning our IUI), and I would already be asking the doctor “Ok, if this doesn’t work what can we do next?” That helped me for some reason…felt like I was making progress. After a few years it’s harder (as you start running out of options and the available options are very pricey), but I managed to do it til I got my BFP.
- Do your research. I went to my OBGYN for infertility treatment for over a year, and because I did my research I was able to dictate a large portion of my treatment. I knew what people with qualities similar to mine were successful with, and I would ask for it. Most of the time I got what I wanted, which was nice. Look through blogs/forums and see what other people have done/tried and why…ask questions…and all that information will only help you
- Feel free to tell people to fuck off. Seriously. All these people who say “Oh, everything happens for a reason,” and “Just relax, it’ll happen,” and “Just stop trying and before you know it you’ll be pregnant!”…..let them have it. Teach them some etiquette.
Ending a list at 7 points is weird, but that’s all I have time for. =)